I’m in Brussels on a layover unable to sleep my full 8 hours…..again. I know what’s coming, the nagging realization starts to surface inside of me….my drinking is getting kinda out of control. How many did I have this time? 3, 4, 5….. I’m unable to remember. Annoyed and aware my pick-up time is only 3 hours from now, I feel sick to my stomach from having had too much beer this time cause is Brussels! I dread the thought of working all the way back to New York with a hangover
My mind is racing with the annoying thoughts about myself ~ “What’s wrong with you?” “You said you would stop at 2” “What happen to your self-control?” “How will you feel if you end up like one of the the people lying in the gutter because you’ve lost everything?”
Next, come the promises to me to do things differently tomorrow. To find a way to fix this. Get back in control.
I fall back to sleep for about 30 minutes before my wake up call.
These middle of the night wake-ups on my International layovers are one of the times I am 100% honest with myself and admit I’m drinking too much. It’s awful. It’s scary. They freak me out.
Yet, the next day I turn back into my happy go lucky self and ignore the misery. I block it all out because I’m a respectable, hard working Wife, Mom, Sister, GlamMa, and friend.
I get home to Palm Beach from my trip, want to relax with “The Hubby” PLUS I don’t feel like controlling my wine intake. I love my wine! I enjoy unwinding and chatting about my trips with TheHubby while drinking. I block out the questions in my head about my habit and ignore the negatives; it’s normal, I’m fun, I’m hardworking, I deserve it!
AND Drink my wine with The Hubby” I do……
I’m home…..it’s 3:00 AM and I’m awake again with my thoughts. I “Rinse and Repeat” this pattern for more than 7 years.
All my drinking is my own secret. I share my thoughts with no one. Nor do I talk about the full extent of my steady, heavy wine intake. Which has now lead to drinking beer in Belgium, Vodka on stressful days and Jamison in Dublin.
Only I can hear the voice in my head regarding my actions. More and more I grow tired of my own private drinking hell.
For me, the solution came about in a unique fashion. My work as a Law of Attraction Trainer and hosting a weekly radio show with my friend and Wellness Coach Stephanie Wood helped me to reprogram my subconscious mind. Each week Stephanie and I would coach and teach each other on the Radio Show. Because I combined what I learned each week on the radio show with my law of attraction practices and Emotion Code Sessions, I began to reprogram my mind.
One day…..it seemed like out of the blue….
I just decided….that’s it……
No more alcohol for me. This was unlike any other decision I’d ever made around my drinking. It was like my mind no longer wanted to drink. I was actually repulsed by the idea of having a drink.
I earned my wings of sobriety by changing my beliefs about myself and alcohol. The shifting of my subconscious beliefs to match what I knew on a conscious level is what allowed sobriety to happen in my life. I am now free from the control of alcohol.
Because I run into more and more woman daily questioning their drinking, yet afraid to seek help because the options they find are not a fit for them. I decided to help other women, just like me, to allow sobriety to happen in their life.
Today, in addition to being a full-time Flight Attendant, I teach women who are trying to drink less how to stop excessive drinking and start living life differently. This website is designed to teach you how to put your own oxygen mask on first, be curious about alcohol and it’s role in your life, as well become a resource to help you see things differently.
In addition to this site, you can find help via my Podcast Sober Curious. If you are here before November 7, 2017, then it’s too early. I’m launching on November 7, 2017.
Thanks for reading this!
I sincerely hope it helps you in some way,
Law of Attraction Trainer
Teacher inspiring you to take Self-Coached Action
and Certified Emotion Code Practitioner